IntanSari

lies.

2010-03-05T02:45:00.002+08:00

i just dont understand it. why do people prefer to tell lies rather then the truth. i know the truth hurts. but let me get this straight, lies are more hurtful. i hate LIAR. in my life, people come and go. telling me all the lies and all i do was believe u people. am i stupid or im just being fooled? i dunnoe. hopefully one day i get the answer.
so easy to tell a lie and just say sorry. that was easy. let's tell lies people! cmon la. lying wont help to cover ur asses ok. one day, the truth will unfold. and that will be the worst nightmare. i just want u to get it straight in ur head! im not scolding, nagging or controlling ur life. just understand, im doing this for ur future. if ure not doing it for me, then do it for yourself. imagine urself in few years to come.
yes, i know i scolded u over small issue. it maybe a small issue for u but not for me. all i wanna say, i hope u still know whr u come from., ur roots. know ur limit and think of yourself. now on, i wont interfere ur life. but remember, any help needed, i'l try to help u. do what u think is best for u. im just a part of ut life. just advising and correcting u. bye! imtired.

Now.

2010-03-03T03:38:00.003+08:00

Life as been different for me now currently. Loving my life as it is. blessed to have him as mine. he was my enemy, friend and bestriend. now, his my lover. thank you for bringing my smile back. at least i know, no more shedding of tears. only tears of happiness. im happy to have him by my side. at least i know there's someone catching me when i fall. thank you, muhd izzat.ily.

well, fighting has been season in a relationship. ex-es may just pop up and spoil everything. it hurt me when i know ure contacting ur ex. let me repeat, EX. and yea, it was me talking to her. sorry if i interfere in ur privacy. but i have to know. i dun wanna the same thing repeating to me again. i hate it. thank you for being truthful though. maybe jealousy just takes over my emotion. im sorry. i just need time alone for NOW.

but i just want u to know. u have been the greatest gift in my life. u change me and teach me what love feels like. thank you. and yea, i love you.

Too much things

2009-11-24T00:43:00.002+08:00

Too much things happening but soo little time to update. yeah, its been long since i last updated my blog. soo sorry. was soo busy with my work. cant even spare time to update my blog. reached home feeling tired and soon falling asleep. that's my everyday routine. seem that i dont even own a life. haha. have been going out frequently. yes, mostly with the BOYFRIENDS. soo nice of you people, although, im the only girl, u people would still wanna bring me along. How sweet of you.. aww. haha. well, thanks for the companion and truly, i appreciates it lots. been spending most of my time with the guys rather than the girls. i just dunnoe why. it seem that my gfs are damn busy with their own things. haha. but its ok, i dun mind. tmrw im on morning shift and yea, pay is coming. :))

Sleeping day..

2009-11-12T20:31:00.002+08:00

two round of night shift. not doing in-charge, instead, doing junior. yea, PSY junior. i just Love it cause someone i admire is lying on that bed im looking after. sad that im doing night cause most of the time, he's asleep. i dun think he even notice me. haha! well, its fine though. looking at him sleep at least make me satisfied. haha. he look cute when he's asleep. aww. i love you, RS.

ended my night and he's for home today. too bad i didnt get the chance to say goodbye. hope to bump into you somewhere ok. haha. today is my sleeping day. reached home and slept for at least hours. got my good rest at last. woke up and house is totally in mess. everyone's missing. so yea, cleaned the whole house. wanted to go out and have my meal but no one is available to accompany me. that sucks! well, just rest at home and hopefully i get my meal. iits been 24hrs since i last had my proper meal. oh gosh! stomach upset.

tomorrow im on off duty. yea, need plenty of rest. i'll be having my car practicals tmrw. cant wait for it. after that, not too sure what plans i have ahead. hope someone just call me or msg me and ask me out. cool-ness! more practicals to come and soon i'll have my test. i hope i could make it before my membership expired. sunday will be attending azam's birthday party. hope it'll be a great one. see you dude. soon, more to come into my life story. Y

Dont get it

2009-11-06T01:58:00.002+08:00

yes, im busy with work and everything. been werking for a week non stop. off day will be this sunday. i just wanna rest, that's all. been long since i last updated my blog. well, alot of things have been going great. enjoy every moment with my working colleagues. thanks guys! you're the best!so yea, just random thoughts here. i just feel something different in my life now. i just dont get it. it seem that everything is just drifting away from me, one by one. soon, i think i end up with nothing at all. just sad to see or say this but its the fact. im having that feeling. but whatever, thanks to my friends who had been by my side all along. although i guess no one knows the real true story of my life. but its ok. tmrw im werking and yes, i have to sleep cause im gonna have sleeping disorder soon. that's bad! Y

The Notebook

2009-10-29T02:27:00.004+08:00

Finally, i managed to grab some time to watch this dvd. Thanks to a friend of mine for borrowing the dvd. will return to you soon ya. after a month plus keeping this dvd at home, i was unable to watch it at all. but glad that today, i managed to watch it. i was on day off today. no plans at all. so yea, cleaned the house and played some games. sleep, eat, and games again. what a wonderful life! haha.

thank you friend for recommending me to watch this DVD. yes, its a nice show. two thumbs up! im loving it. i even shed my tears while watching it. wonder how that author get a nice story to write about. a story where everyone would want to watch and get inspired by it. i am one of it. :)

story was smooth. about two people falling in love with different background. well, separated but in the end back together. how strong their love was. im soo jealous. haha. till white hair grows, the man wont just stop loving her. wont even gave up to help her remember every memories they had. awww..so sweet. will someone do that too when im diagnosed with dementia? haha.

so yea, just finished watching it. how late it is. haha. but whatever, im still stuck here looking for slots for my car practicals. geessh, i need to go for my practicals but couldnt find a slot. too bad. werking afternoon shift later. hmm, hope everything is fine in the ward. i just miss my ward. haha. ok, i wanna werk on my cafe world at fb. Thanks, btw, someone pls drag me to watch the sister keeper. heard that its a good movie. been long since i last step to the cinema. :) Y

Wedding Dinner

2009-10-19T02:36:00.005+08:00

Well, firstly a big CONGRATULATIONS to Rayden and Kristie on their successful wedding. well, knew them for quite few years and truly, they are both nice people. well, rayden, ure lucky to get her as ur wife and to kristie ure lucky to have him too. well, best of luck to this newly weds. may God bless you and hope you both will last forever. Hope to make more babies k. haha.

So yea, last sat attended their wedding dinner. thank you for inviting us. although we sat far back at the hall, we still do appreciate it. haha! so yea, it was such a big event for this two people. happy for both of you. well, sad part was towards the ending where i learnt that our family bonding was the best one. hw important family is.you guys made me wanna shed my tears. haha! well, everything went well and smoothly.

Thank you to my two gorgeous girlfriends who also showed up. well, although its quite sad that you both went off leaving me all alone. but im fine though. thanks.

Random Thoughts

2009-10-17T02:18:00.002+08:00

Friday was just another day off for me. i was having my car practicals that afternoon. head to bbdc under the hot sun. soo yea, did what i have to. saw a friend of mine having his practical too, Izzat. so yea, after practical chat with him for awhile. decided to grab dinner together at kfc. so yea,met him at cwp as he was riding. had our dinner at horizon. thanks friend for the short dinner. walked around cwp and saw a friend of mine too. wah, you look like a matrep already. better be careful yea. dun fall into their groups k. we'll meet up soon dude. :)

soo, izzat had to go as he has soccer to play. soo, i decided not to went home early. stroll around cwp looking for stuff. when i just stop and called someone, i heard someone shouted my name. geessh, it was my mum, dad and sister. well, had to follow them then. accompanied them for dinner and went to cold storage to buy some groceries. home sweet home after that. was sitting watching tv when suddenly my craving came. i want this mini crackers at 7eleven! so yea, went out frm house at 11pm to buy those food. haha. cravings over now.

was playing the comp for awhile just now. mum starts nagging. asking me to stop and telling me to find a right guy and not fb-ing only. wth! pls mum. im not even ready to find someone new. its suck k. soo pls, stop nagging. i just hate people nagging at me. its kinda pissed me off. soon im off too bed. tmrw had to attend a dinner wedding. so yea, thanks people for reading my post. Y

Im soo sick.

2009-10-15T01:47:00.003+08:00

well. yea.. been awhile i never update my blog. been busy with work and some stuffs. here i am to just write something that came across. thank you to my friend for keeping me smile all this while. but as time past, i think maybe ure right, ure better off without me. i dun wanna interfere anymore in ur life. and i rather be alone. and hell yea, i found the reason why my ex left me. cause im not the type of girl that express everything. yea, i keep everything within myself. till now, i bet nobody knows what ive gone thru. too bad! u either like it or hate it. to a fren of mine, what u did was maybe right. maybe thats the best. soo yea, im alone now leading my life. and hell yea, i just wanna be alone leading this life. my life either be a meaningful one or just a suck one soon. haha. sometimes i wonder why nice people always finish last! but nvm, i dun expect anything. i just wanna live my life alone cause at the end of it, i die alone too. and yea, i admit i suddenly feel soo tired and sick of everything. i dun ask for sympathy from any of you..all i want was just ur sincerity. be friends with me sincerely. im nice to you soo pls i hope i get the same treatment. hurting me is just like killing me Y

Lebaran with Friends.

2009-10-07T01:35:00.002+08:00

yea. it was last sat that i went hari raya with my fellow old sec school mates. it was a big group howver, i had great time with everyone. thanks everyone for making this thing to happen. sad that some of them are not there but its ok. will make it again this week? haha. hope soo. it was hard gathering all of them cause some are busy working and some are busy serving the nation. but we manage to gather no matter what.

thinking back, im soo happy to gain this friendship i have with all this wonderful people. and yea, im happy with u people around me. this hari raya has been a great one for me. although i broke up with him but still, i manage to hari raya with my love ones. and yea, it was a different but yet a wonderful feeling. well, congrats to some of my friends who have already had their driving license. and yea, im coming sooon... hahah!

more pics are uploaded in fb. so yea, feel free to browse hundreds of it. and the guys are planning for the next hari raya outing this week. geesshh. i hope i could make it guys. many plans are coming ahead for me and i cant wait for that to come. soo pls, make time fly faster. Y

Geylang cums Hari Raya.

2009-10-01T12:55:00.004+08:00

yesterday was a tiring day for me. mum woke us up early in the morning. had to force myself up. well, started to clean the whole house cause mum decided to went geylang. so yea, dad drove there around 2pm. it was damn a hot whether, luckily dad drive. if not, that's it. i better off sit at home. haha. reached geylang and went to stroll around. mum bought some cookies cause the cookies at home are finishing! and my friends have not yet come. my siblings just keep eating those. and yea, i hope this cookies will last till sat. haha. most time was wasted on the jewellery shop. mum just keep bargaining the price and going around to buy more. haha. so, my sis bought a gold necklace. and i bought nothing. haha. i just dun feel like buying anything. haha! so went off from geylang around 7 plus. on the way home, caught with a jam at the BKE. stuck there almost for 15mins. haha.

reached home around 8 plus and mum decided to go hari raya for a short trip.just a few houses. so yea, mum decided to visit her old friend house in wlds. the one which mum wants me to see her son, the Mr policeman. haha! so yea, long time never see this makcik. alot of difference huh. sat there and chat but too sad, the son was working. so mum was asking abt his name and all. when suddenly a part of it across my mind. this guy must be a friend of someone i know! shitt. haha. so yea, i msg my dear friend and asked whther he knows this guy whom my mum refering. and yea, he knows this mr policeman! haha. what a small world. ok mum, better stop this match making thingy. and to my dear friend, better shut all this up k. cause he dont know anything at all. even his mum dun know my mum intention! haha. ok back to story. after that house, went to dad's sister house at yishun. been a long time i've never seen them. and the last one was during last year hari raya. haha. after that, went to my sis house at toa payoh. sat there quite long. home around 12 plus. im exhausted. hope we could hari raya again cause there's a few houses which mum have not managed to go. soon ya. cant wait for sat to come! raya-ing with my friends. and today im not night shift..gonna be sleepy! haha. ok, better to clean my hse now. Y

F1

2009-09-28T23:38:00.004+08:00

Sunday plan was just to meet my ex after work and went around town. so yea, we walked around town and started our window shopping. still, nothing caught my eyes. Decided to have our dinner at sakura far east. soo yeah, he and his baby squids, me with just simple noodle. so everything was just fine, we talked and catched up with each other. We really had alot of stories to share huh. after eating, he decided to catch the Formula One race at Marina Bay. so, headed to marina bay. it was just packed with people around. While walking, heard the speed of the car passing by. My God, it hurt my ears but i enjoy the speed! haha.

So, we decided to stand in front of marina square and watch it. We couldnt get a clear view but manage to catch it. eventually, he insisted to buy tickets and wanted to go in and watch. WTH! i just feels that its a waste of money. Nothing fun. So yea, while standing there and fighting, someone approach us and asked us whether we want to have their tixs. Selling it at 30 bucks. Good deal but i dun think soo. sooo, my ex was soo excited. He really pleading me to buy it and watch. but i just dont want too. soo sorry dude! and yea, somehow i manage to msg some of my friends whom i know going or working there. but it seem that my luck was just not on that day. too bad..

After that, went in marina square and took some pics. He was soo addicted to the F1. Standing straight watching the big television showing the race. so yea, the last lap came and the winner was Hamilton! and everyone just shouted and celebrate! Cool.. soo supportive. and on the way back to the MRT. saw a cameraman with a reporter. and my ex who cant resist camera started to yahhuu at the cameraman. and yea, he was caught by the reporter for a short interview. while being interviewed, i was just standing far ahead. just dun want to be involved. haha!

Soo.. a tiring day on sunday followed by morning shift just now. im just too sleepy and restless now. After work just now, went to visit my ex' grandma who was admitted in the hospital. Hope u get well soon nenek! and yea, thanks dude for accompanying me on sunday. it was nice to see u. after visited his grandma, i decided to just went home first cause my eyes just cant help it. on the way home, mum called me and asked me to accompany her at cwp. i was shocked to know that she went shopping alone. my mum just cant stop going out..soo pls, when i go out everyday, dun complain. cause u do the same too.. haha. so yea, she wanted to buy a nice blouse at metro. Being a good daughter, i bought it for her. aww.. soo sweet! haha. had my supper at Macdonalds with mum and went home straight. and now, im just sleepy. need to sleep for now. will update more.. and i hope i'll go raya one day. Need to wear my new baju raya! havent even touch it at all. geesshh.. Y

Dun need Love.

2009-09-24T18:59:00.003+08:00

When i run out of topic, maybe Love would be a nice topic to talk abt. its a Hot topic among people. Love among two individual. but not all people will gain the same love. its all diffrent. all this are based on my own view yaarr. Love do exist for people and i do believe that. We fall in love easily. Love just makes us blind sometimes. Love is a feeling from one individual to another, be it strong or weak. Love is the greatest feeling that everyone wanna have. But for me, i'm sick of Love. suddenly it came across my face that i dun need love for the time being now. I just dun need love but i just need someone to be by my side and make me smile. That will be the greatest feeling for me.

I've fallen in love before. and when i broke up, its hard to find someone to catch me. i was living my life on my own. breaking up was the hardest part but as time fly, i realise that living life as a single was much way better. Love has made me blind. i was in love previously, deeply. i dun even bother abt my feelings but instead concern abt my partner's feelings. i rather get hurt than seeing my partner getting hurt. that's my way of love. and as time fly, i realise i need to make a change. im not that expressive abt my love and i admit, i lost in love due to that. but i dun regret any of it. cause, frm it, i learn to be a better person. i learnt the meaning of Love.

Now, i dun need Love in my life. Without Love, im happy now. Thanks to all my friends who are there for me. im stronger now than before. although i admit, im jealous seeing all the couples walking around. but im still standing still on my two feets. Im not a supermodel, i still eat macdonalds.. so, i aint that perfect u see. accept me for who i am. hurting me is as bad as killing me. but no worries, im living my life independently now. and truly, im coping well. Loving every single moments i have now. and who say i cant be single? i can. im more happy to be single. i learnt that i dun need love but i need just someone to be by my side. and knowing a few guys around me, im glad i know them. although some played around, but im blessed to be one of ur friends. cause lover wont make us happy always but someone by our side will make our day usually. Loves. Y

Eid Mubarak.

2009-09-21T18:47:00.007+08:00

Firstly selamat hari raya to all the Muslims out there. Ramadhan is over and here we are to celebrate our victory. Syawal is here for this year. here i am seeking forgiveness frm everyone i know. Sorry for everything that i did which may just hurt u people somehow. Still, i love you guys to earth. :)

yeah..first day of raya was normal for me. Every year has been the same for me. Mum cooking early in the morning. had to woke up at 8 to just help her in the kitchen. Cooking like 6-8 dishes? ouh my..the kitchen was just in a messed. Mum was lucky to have 3 daughters, helping her. so yea, we ended quite late, in the afternoon. yest, only one of my relative come over. and i dun even know cause i was asleep when they came. im just too tired. i dun even know who came over my house yest. haha. im just not in the mood for raya this year.

Second day, mum woke me up at 8am again. gosh! wake me up and asked me to rush to the nearby wet market and buy muttons! i had to forced myself up. lucky bro accompanied me with his bike. so bought all the things that mum wrote in the shopping list. reached home and i sat at the sofa,resting. at 1pm, mum started her business in the kitchen. and there we were to help her again. oh my, cooking and cleaning for two consecutive days just made me really tired. mum just cant stop cooking. but the ones eating are just us! haha. i have to maintain my diet. so pls mum, stop cooking. :)

Now, dad's working friends are here at my house. all the chinese are just nice to come over and celebrate it with us. so now, i have the chance to update my blog as mum and dad are busy talking to them. in a while, my sis Bf will be coming over. thats all i know who will be coming today. well, soo sad that i dun have much relatives. my mum is an indonesian catholic, so, no one celebrate hari raya except christmas. and dad, not much relatives though. maybe i can count with my two hands. haha. sad that i dun even have grandma and grandpa to celebrate with. even when im small, they're gone. they're gone just too soon. how i wished they could see my siblings grow.

Im just sad that my hari raya aint that great as others. but whatever it is, im happy that i still have my family and friends around me celebrating. and i shuld be fortunate cause im celebrating it. and i know, somehow, out there, there's people who are less fortunate than me. so yea, i hope this raya will be somehow bring great memories. tmrw, im back to work. how soon is that right? too bad, work may be better then sitting at home i guess. haha. to my friends, beep me if u wanna come over my house. Love you.Y

Selamat Hari Raya

2009-09-19T01:10:00.005+08:00

its been a month! yea, it looks like a month but its not. soo yea, i was fasting well this month. only threw a few days due to monthly menses, haha. time flies soo fast. couldnt believe that hari raya is coming in just a few hours.cool! just soo excited over hari raya. not because of getting money or what.just happy for the delicious food and kuehs. gosh, i just cant resist my kuehs. haha! handmade by me, sis and mum. it was like a last minute kueh making. but we manage to finish it and get over with it. curtains are all up, kuehs done. im just soo excited now. haha.
this year will be a diffrent year for me. its not like my previous year. but,im happy for myself now. im coping well and yea, im happy this way. still, hari raya still meant alot for me. hari raya is a month of forgiveness. so yea, im here to seek apologises frm people who knows me. sorry for any wrong doings, bad mouthing or even hurting someone. may it be accidentally or not. im just sorry. hope im forgiven and lets open a new beginning for us. haha.
to my friends, u people are invited to come over my place for raya. just beep me before you people decide on my hse. haha,cause this year, i have to give that green packets. geesshh. how sad to know that i have no collection anymore. proving to me that im getting older. haha. whatever. so yea, SELAMAT HARI RAYA people. Y

Just too much.

2009-09-15T22:59:00.003+08:00

yea. i just feel damn tired and exhausted today. my head is just spinning around. i just cant take it. went for my car practical this morning, went home straight and i knocked off. woke up only to realise that its break fast time. sorry sister, couldnt help u. i just feel soo weak suddenly.
Car practicals. yea, been so enthusiatic in taking it at first. spend every single money i have for it. i was so on abt it. study hard for every theory tests and yea, i passed. went every car practicals that i could. now,im still stuck somewhere cause there's no more slots available for me. gosh, i just hate it. so last night, stayed up till 7am and get to book one lucky slots! its been a month since i went there. so yea, slept at 7 am and woke up 3 hrs later. went for my car practical. the instructor was a diff one. so yea, i was damn blur and stupid during that practical. i admit! i stalled the engine so many times despite repetitive warning frm the instructors. i was soo blur when it comes to changing down gears. i hate that part. somehow, halfway of the practical, i just feel like stopping and get out frm there. i just cant handle it. im soo sorry instructor. he's been too patience. i dunnoe. suddenly i just feel like giving up in this. i know i shuldnt but i just cant take it anymore. just wanna cry my heart out!! geessh.forget it!
whatever.just forget it. just see where it brings me soon. right now i just wanna rest my mind out of everything. everything seem cock up this few days. aarrgg. tmrw werking. i hope i could have that clear mind to work tmrw. dunnoe what's happening in the ward soo far. hmm. wondering. Y

Saturday.

2009-09-14T12:05:00.002+08:00

yea. last saturday. was on morning shift. after work, had plans with my friends. been a long time we gather guys. so yea, plan was to break fast together at geylang. so, waited for zai,dan and izzat at city hall. all of us went on our own way. some went first and some came later. so i met them around 5 plus. reached geylang at 6. it was already pack by then. decided to eat at the new pasar geylang, howver, people are already sitted there earlier. so, no space for us. changed of place. to eat at the coffee shop behind joo chiat complex. yea, there's plenty of space there. settled down there while we wait for the others to arrive. well, order our foods while some of the guys smuggle foods there. haha! very bad. after done eating, only then 3 of the other guys joined us! had to sit there longer and wait for them to eat. after done eating, these guys still had cravings for dengdeng and stuffs. so yea, we walked along that hot bazaar. went in nicely and sweet, came out frm the bazaar with sweats! haha. Dan was all wet with sweats! yucks, haha.
yea, i was soo tired at that point of time. walked and followed them blindly. howver, somewhere, i got lost. i cant find them. so, i walked alone thru that bazaar. at the same time looking for the stuffs that im looking for. for abt 30 mins later, someone called me. yea, only then they realise that im not with them! thanks friend. soo caringg. :)
so yea, i still cntinue my own walking. i just cant find the thing that im looking for. so yea, i decided to meet them back at the mrt. sat there and had a rest. im just super tired. im just not me at that time. so sorry guys. working made me feel damn exhausted. after that, decided to went home. took the train. and i just cant take it. had my nap till it reached wlds. yea, im that tired!! haha. however, thanks friend for the day out. next time just dont drag me along when post- working. haha. photos are with zai, dunnoe if he will upload it. just wait patiently. Y

Just the Two of us.

2009-09-12T01:19:00.005+08:00

off day was a day out for me. no matter what it is, i have to go out and breathe that fresh air outside. so yea, plan was to break fast with my gf, nurul. called my other half, idah, but she was unable to follow cause she got her own plans up. so yea, it was just the two of us. no one else. we did talk and catch up with each other. it's been long since i saw u and talk to you babe. had our dinner at KFC. craving for that burger and chicken. so, bought both of it and share. however, ate one chicken was enough for us. burger was left untouched. haha! and babe no worries abt the treat. :)
after dinner, walked around cwp as usual. nothing caught my eyes as usual. after tired of cwp, we stroll around the bazaar. and nothing caught my eyes too. im just getting bored of wlds. haha. so, i had craving of air kathira suddenly. bought 3 bottles of it and we sat around civic. drinking that kathira really satisfy me. so we talked and talked. and without us realising. we were surrounded by matreps. one on the right and one on the left. nowhere to run. sat there for long, when we decided to just make a move. so, we had to choose one path to walk pass. is it the right or the left. so nurul decided to walk pass by the left side. the tattoo guys. haha! and yea, we walked pass when one of them just say.."BYE CUTE". haha. and i know its not me, but its for nurul cause that mat have been staring at nurul for long. kan nurul? haha. my fren is cute! lol.
and yea. thats the journey and story of my life today. what a day off. just spending time with one of my friend had made my day. so it dont bother who. tmrw will be a long day for me. working in the morning. after work maybe going geylang to break fast with the rest of my friends. been a long time since i break fast with u people. but however, mum asked me to join her for a bdae party of my nephew. hmm? cant decide now. just see where my feet brings me tmrw. geylang or toa payoh? haha. so yea. im just slow and stupid in decision making sometimes. i hate this part. Y

Love Life.

2009-09-11T12:55:00.002+08:00

time for an update. yeah, been busy lately due to work and stuffs. has been working straight for a week. today, finally, i get my day off. yeah, only one day for me to rest. and i wont rest cause i just wanna make use of my day off. maybe go out and have fun! right now. no plans yet for the afternoon.lets talk abt the days i' ve been thru.
Yest, plan to break fast with my dearest 4 girlfriends. however, each of them have their own schedule. so, it was cancelled. too bad. at the end of it, i break fast with my two working friends. ok guys, u bth drive me nuts. haha. break fast at Pizza Hut wlds. yea, we had our 5 dinner course. all four courses done, waited for the last course, desert. haha! we were wanting it as if we're gonna have one earthquake ice cream. howver, it was only one scp of ice cream. haha! we just waste much time talking and gossiping abt people all around us. yea, had fun with you guys.
working has made me really tired this few days. i was like running around and calling around. it just made me tired. really. sometimes i wonder, is this what i want or what. cause sometimes, i just feel like quiting. but i wont quit easily. i will only rest if i need to but i wont give up that easy. no job will come easy. soo yea, i'll try my best in this career. for my future! yeah.Y

Soonnn..

2009-09-06T02:59:00.004+08:00

Two beautiful couples.
Both are two very close people in my life. yeah. i do love you people. from pri school till now, i see how u grow and bring urself up. u two had such a beautiful life stories. to begin with, you people had such a long story. previously, had boyfriends whom you love soo much. hold that long relationship. but in the end, it just ended. saw how u cried over that long relationship. i feel the pain at that moment. weeks and months needed for that heart to heal.however, you too had been strong and move on with life. although some time you people just turn back and remember the past. but you two just keep on going.you people get to know a few people and met nice people somehow.

Nurul, i saw how u grow in life. ur past maybe something that u dun wanna turn back now. cause i know, u regret loving him. but pls, no regrets. it's ur mistake to not learn frm it. u keep on hanging to him when he dun even bother you. somehow, you cried to us. and we helped as much we could to make u realise. it takes time but the time arrive. you did realise one day that he's nothing worth ur tears. so, u move on although i know its hard for u. when half way ur life, a guy appear in ur life, DD. he's a guy with full of mystery. haha. he's a nice guy. a guy who care abt you and love u sincerely with all his heart. and i can see that. and i knw, he''s way better than your ex. so, now, ure happy with DD right. God send you an angel. hope it last.

Etri, you've been one strong sister. going thru ur life must be tough i admit. ur previous love, i know its hard. but u just keep trying. although i never had a chance to see you cry but i know, u did cry in ur heart. u did cried at night when people are asleep. i may not be the first person to know ur love story but i can feel it. u've been one great person. you left him for good. and i knw, its hard for you to let him go. u keep on worrying abt him. u wish, u hadnt make that decision. but as time past, u moved on. u get to know ASRAF. a guy with full of mystery. he's been great to you. and although u got financial probs with him, u both still keep strong. he's one guy whom really loves and care abt you. and i knw, ure happy with him now.

gosh. just personal post to my two gorgeous people. u people had been up and down. howver, still standing strong now. and now, leading a happy and blissful life. and peeps, this two couples may be getting Engaged probably by next year! that's their plan so far.and im glad to hear that! hope it will happen and last. you people just grow soo fast. just keep going strong with that relationship that you have now. dun look back in ur past ya. the future and present are the days you would want to look forward too. keep on fighting and never walk away! Loves. Y

Johore Bahru

2009-09-06T01:48:00.006+08:00

hell yea. i did went out today. a trip to the neighbouring country, JB. didnt expected it to really work out. but the plan work out. haha. so only the four of us went there. went there to just break fast together. haha. how sweet. sorry if didnt tag anyone else along. it was a last min thing and it seem everyone is busy. next week will be our gathering to geylang aite peeps!

so, went to JB around 5pm. headed to city square and look for something nice to eat. settle down at the portugese chicken stall. so, we had our meal. gave up on that half chicken. had to use my hand to eat it. soo unglamourous! we are the sporeans people who have class but selekeh. haha. all four of us are using our hands to eat that chicken. when we look around, none of them use hands. haha. we really dun practice table manners. gosh! after the meal, had a stroll around city square. look here and there. after a long stroll, settle down at the ice cream corner. had our waffle ice creams and banana split. geesh, i want more of it! after ice creams, had our final relaxing corner. we sat down at coffee bean! bought our coffee ice blend drinks. totally, today we just had alot of munching and drinking. haha! well, day was nicely spent with those lovely friends around. thanks guys for the day out. it was a nice one! next trip, BATAM?? haha.

ok, to the rest of the peeps. next week, geylang plss. haha.i need to buy my white baju raya! missing every single one of my friends. they're just great people. truly, im standing strong now due to all those great people. My friends and family. You guys gave me the strength to keep moving forward.thank you alot.i learnt to be strong in life and look ahead. a part of my life is forming back. just finely. ILOVEYOU. Y

Just plain.

2009-09-05T09:58:00.003+08:00

haha. be careful girls when men start to compliment you. they may just mean it in a different way. haha. and guys, pls dun follow this way. girls do have some part of beauty but their beauty doesnt really makes you to forget ur wallet right? haha.

ok back to life. yest was on morning shift. work was hectic for me. had to rush thing and im still slow. shiitt. but nevertheless, i completed my work and went to town with my sister. she was damn busy looking for her bf birthday present. both of us were just blank. didnt know what to buy. wish a guy would just help us but no one came. haha. at the end of it, didnt bought anything for the birthday boy, instead, bought something for ourself. wth?! this is what happen when we girls shop. never did reached our objectives. haha. and for me, i was strolling around the whole town but didnt even fnd ONE thing pleasant.! shit, i dun even know whats happening. i get my pay, wanted to shop, but nothing. anyone wanna get my card and just shop for me?! haha.

yea, it truly kills me when i go town and return empty handed. waste my fare! haha.today is my friend POP but im still here at home. i dun think im going cause the guys are going with bikes there. they invited me but nah, its ok. so today had no plans, i dun even know whether my working friends will be breaking fast together. or they just simply forget abt it. haha. so, i plan to go geylang today. so pls..no matter what, i'll just pull someone to go with me today if no one wanna go. so, if you had a call or a msg from me, beware! i might just grab u along with me. haha. counting down the time. Y

Work.

2009-09-04T00:48:00.002+08:00

Work as been tiring for me.been busy lately with work. i hate morning shift. just had to drag my lazy foot to work. was soo sleepy.well, time flies fast. following the dr rounds and making the changes takes alot of time.been managing it well enough for the past few days. i somehow enjoy my job. taking care of people and talking to them. some of the patients just make my day. well, trying to find other experience if i could.haha. been working for a week without any day off or rest. my off will be this weekends! i cant wait for it to come. well, sat will be Zai's POP. hope i could make it friend. so sorry if i cant, maybe im just tired. :)
plan for sat was to break fast with my friends, hwever, not all could make it this week. so, its best, to just cancel it and postpone to next week friends. well, not breaking fast with my beloved friends but breaking fast with my wokring colleagues instead. plan was sakura international buffet. but i dun think thats a good idea. cause i just dun eat much when i break fast! haha. and now, i dun even know if im going or what cause i'm following the majority. if i dont, then, i'll just meet my friends then. haha.
Brother fetched me from work just now. thanks bro. however, we nearly met with an accident. we were turning left when a car just swift in. my bro had to swift his bike to the right back. omg! that was the first panic. second was, we were exiting to wlds ave 2 when the same car changed his mind and swift in to the exit! crazy driver! this is what i called reckless driver. luckily we reached home safely. tmrw im on morning shift. but im still awake now. haha. just cant sleep now. after work tmrw, had plans ahead. yea, i need more plans and outing! Y

Splendid.

2009-08-30T00:46:00.003+08:00

today was a tiring day for me. yest had only an hour of sleep then proceed to work. work was normal, problem was, being too sleepy. after werk, had to go home straight. dad had some gathering for the family. i reached home at 6pm. had to help mum in the kitchen. Food was just too much.mum cook nasi lemak and noodles. dad ordered some pizzas and some of my relatives brought side dishes. so, it was just soo much. it was nice to see all of us gather as one. and i just loves my nephews! gosh..u guys are killing me. the one in the picture is DENISE. i had to feed him and i just got him to fall asleep. well, i was just lying beside him when i realise that i fall asleep too. haha! when i woke up, he's no where to be found. haha.
well, firstly Happy Birthday to my dad! his bdae was on the 28th Aug.. hope ure happy with the gathering just now. breaking fast together! how sweet.

so, Saturday was well spent with my family around me. lets do this more often mum! haha. sunday comes, im werking morning tmrw. im just tired. can i just take a break plss. till then, will continue my life story soon. more to come! hope soo. Y

What winning is all about.

2009-08-26T01:01:00.003+08:00

This video has made me understand the meaning that you intend to get across.

Life

2009-08-26T00:35:00.005+08:00

Life is just like a game. sometimes we win, sometimes we lose. i admit i lose in some part of my life and sometimes i win. Losing has made me to be a stronger person. it teaches me to be postive and move on. although its hard to move on, i believe that i could if i want too. its all in my hands to handle this. thanks to him to wake me up and make me open my eyes. chatting with you that night has made me realise that i still have a wonderful life ahead to go thru. and i know, i shuldnt have turn back and look at my past. i shuld just forget it and looked forward in life. i knw, i shuldnt have any regrets in life cause it doesnt have any difference at all. its just a waste to feel that. cause feeling regrets just made me feel damn worst than before. i admit i made a bad decision in leaving you and hurting you previously. although, i knw u made me smile and truly that point of time, i am falling. thank you for catching me and i appreciate the time and energy that you wasted on me. and when ure gone out of my life, i realise that im missing you. and i knw its too late. but i wont regrets anything here. i would just learn from my mistakes and ensure that this wont repeat again. i hope soo. ive been knowing few guys around and i thanked those guys who made me smile and made me know more about the meaning of life and happiness. although, its just for temporary, the impact on me will be permanent. Thank you again.
thats what i have to say. thanks to my friend for the advises, but its too late for me. and now, i believe that God is listening to every corner of my heart's whisper. i hope he'll help me in this and give me the strength i've been wanting. and as a part of it, i'll do my part to move on and carry on with life. Thanks to my friends again for being there and helping me with every probs i have to say. I'll live and Love my life. Y

Loves.

2009-08-21T01:28:00.003+08:00

yeah..its been months since i gather my wonderful girls around me. and that day, i manage to gather you people. it was wonderful to see you people there. truly, im missing everyone of you. and i hope we would gather like this again soon. u people had made my life complete. cant believe that you guys are growing that fast. all of you may be busy with ur own relationship but i appreciate the time you people could spare to me. all the best to you in ur relationship. to my sis, i hope what u plan, ur engagement, will be a reality by next year. im excited for you though. to the other two of my friends, keep loving ur bf guys! dun lost the love cause those guys are totally sincere to you. i could see it with my own eyes. u people dun have to worry abt me cause im doing just fine currently. looking forward to every coming days. starting to love my life!

now i learnt that life aint that easy. its tough. i do believe that evrything happens for a reason. its either good or bad but whatever it is we have to learn our mistakes. frm there, dun ever try to repeat the same mistakes. from this mistakes, it makes us to be a better person. and i hope, i would be a better person in the future. i admit i do make some bad decision in my life but i cant turn back time you see. i wish i could but its not gonna happen.

thats abt it peeps. and in case im busy due to my work, i just wanna wish all the muslims out there. SELAMAT MENYAMBUT BULAN RAMADHAN yang akan tiba. semoga bulan ini tidak seperti bulan2 yang lalu. mcm paham je aku.and to my friends, gather everyone soon for break fast ya! Y

Monday.

2009-08-18T00:26:00.002+08:00

just hate monday. i was on morning shift just now. however, i woke up late. woke up at 6 and i have to reached work at 7. and i know i cant make it. but i tried my best. take a quick shower and everything. thought of asking my brother to send me to work, however, he said he is also late for work! wth! so, i had no choice but to take a cab. i hate this man, wasting my money on cab. geesh, im gonna make sure that this is my first and last one. i know i was late, so this taxi driver was trying to speed. however, traffic jam just made me sick. when out of sudden, an ambulance just on its siren and people are giving way to it. i wish im in that ambulance van. so that i'll reach my work place on time. but thanks to the uncle, he was smart enough to give way and tailgating the ambulance then. but im still late la uncle! haha. so i was like 10 mins late. feel so awful man. i hate being late. just not me..
work was too overload for me. my patients are getting sicker and sicker. looking at them just made me more sick. haha! well, it was damn busy this few days. i have been staying up in the ward lately. sitting there being a paranoid. half of my day are spent in the ward. my ward manager will be proud to have a worker like me. :) today i stayed up till 6 plus in the ward. and yea, i just dun feel like going home early. called my friends up, all of them are busy. i was damn hungry at that point of time. soo, keep looking for someone to accompany me. and yea, i did find my LLL(figure it out). and actually i was a bit shy to meet you and ur friends cause i did something bad to u in the past. however, i still wanna be in contact with u. so, i had to force myself to just meet and see u there. nice to see you there. i just dun feel like eating macdonald, and by just sitting there eating the air makes me full i guess. haha. its been a long time since i saw u. and glad to see you dude. can sense that something is bothering you, share it if u want. im willing to hear ur heart out. once again, im sorry abt the past. now, im just letting time to decides everything for me. Y

Its Totally Over.

2009-08-16T23:44:00.002+08:00

Its been two days since i last had my proper meal. geessh, im soo busy with work till i dun even bother about my stomach. so sorry stomach. :). well, just dun feel the urge to eat for this time being. maybe this is how i prepare myself for the fasting month! yea..soo pls make it official to me. lol.
well, yest had a meet up session with my friends and my ex was there. and so, its best to talk things to him. so, i asked him what ive been keeping in my mind all this while. and yea, we talked things out and i really asked him for a conclusion. and i just thanked him for the advises. yea, im moving on dude! and i hope u make a wise decision. and i respect it. thanks anyway. however, i was angry at some point of the conversation. that was when u said, all this 4 years with me, there's NO love at all..only sympathy and care. WTF! all this while my love towards you was sincere but u dun even love me, u just sympathise me! omg..why would u even dare to do that to me. u shuld have just throw me for the first year..why do u have to drag soo long and try to love me. I just suddenly have to say this, im beginning to Hate you! well, what goes around comes around dude. and yea, i'm moving on! and i'll find a better guy than you for sure. im not even sad or what. im just filled with anger currently. i dun even cry when u say those words, cause i dun feel it anymore.
thats it peeps. thats what happening with my life now. but im fine though. love my life now. currently, i just need a break from everything. and i just think i need to go to an island, maybe Rawa Island. and yea, it will be soon. anyone wanna tag along. beep me aites. haha! and truly, im missing every little people that come past in my life. thanks though. Y

Waffles.

2009-08-14T21:46:00.003+08:00

my cravings for waffle ice cream is over. oh my, the waffle just go nicely with the ripple ice cream. it was just perfect. although its quite expensive, i dun mind tasting it. now, searching for the best waffle in town! any recomendation? i had found my best cheng tng! haha. its at my hospital kopitiam! the best so far. yeaa..had to taste all this before the fasting months come. i know i gain weight lately but i'll lose some during the fasting month. no worries. haha!
well, been busy with work lately. however, appreciates alot cause my bro just keep fetching me from werk. yea, just because he got a new pipe for his bike! well, thanks bro for fetching me without fail. but today, i went home by train alone. gesh, just hate it when office hours are over. the train are fully packed and people just keep squeezing in. and im getting scared as i had some trauma with some people. lol. just hate the cramp and squeezing! nothing can be done though.
well, cant wait for fasting month to come. pls come fast!! im just soo excited. haha. i'll fast and exercise at the same time. and i hope by Hari Raya, i'll lose weight. :) Y

Make up my mind.

2009-08-10T02:14:00.004+08:00

thinking and thinking is what i do in my free time. sometimes i just wanna take a break from thinking abt things. but i just cant. things just keep on running in my mind. and yeah, finally, i made up my mind. i quit. i dun wanna hope anything more frm my ex. meeting u or hearing ur voice, doesnt have any effects on me anymore. suddenly, i just lost the love. it takes me a long time to feel this and i dun know why. and when my bestfriends talked to me abt this, i realise that i shuldnt have hope that u came back in my life. cause i know, uve moved on. but as days passed, i finally made up my mind that im not gonna hope or wait for u anymore. or even in the upcoming years u wanan turn to me back, i wont accept it. cause i aint that simple for u to throw and pick me up back. im sorry. i've been to generous to u till i hurt myself for nothing. and i dun think, u could be the one that will stand beside me when i need someone. and for ur info, im not even satisfied with my previous love stories. i wont say ure the best in my life cause i dun think u are. cause ur love just torture me enough. and i had enough of that. and if ure reading this, good for u. this is what i've been wanting to tell u. i wont regret our love, u shuld be. cause u just cant see the difference between love and true love.
arrghh.. this word "Love" just made me sick. it comes and go easily. i hate it.i just dun wanna think abt it too much. all i can say..LOve just torture me. yea, i did fall in love somehow.. but due to some circumstances, i wanna free myself frm it. cause i think its too soon to get a new partner. i dun wanna repeat the same mistakes i did. i just want to understand this love thingy. cause all i need now is just true love from someone sincere. i just need one guy to prove to me that all of them are not the same. cause now in my mind, i think u people are just the same. u guys just cant resist girls who are more better than us. and from there, u tend to let go the sincere one.whatever..all i can say is.. may you be happy with ur life. cause i dun wanna interfere with it. just let me be single for life and take care of my parents. haha. oh maybe, my lover is just in some other country. someone maybe a portugese? indonesian? lol. i wished. i may have no one at some point of time, but its ok. cause at the end of it, i die on my own too. soo, right now, i just have to stand on my two feets alone. and from now, i can say. Im starting a new beginning. Opening my eyes to search my true soulmate. wth. mepeks. ok, im done. going to my lala land.thanks to all the people who listened to my probs and make me open my eyes. cause somehow, love just makes us blind. just need someone to wake us up frm that. and i hope, when my soulmate catched me, just look into my eyes and tell me that word i've been waiting for. and, i'll give you my life and soul. haha. ok whatever, im getting crapier. lala land! Y

Weekends.

2009-08-10T01:44:00.002+08:00

this weekend was a relaxing and splendid day for me. well, at last someone called me up on that sat and asked me out. cool! thanks for reading my blog and inviting me out. haha. invite me out again ya. i'll tell u my schedule and make sure u call me every day when im off so that im not bored at home. its killing me. i just cant sit at home. my legs just wanna walk, mouth just wanna talk and eyes just wanna see everything in this world. :)
saturday was just a short trip to town. went to ION. cool, first time there. so, abit lost somewhere. haha. but overall, awesome. soo comes sunday, which i dun expected my guy friends called me up and invited me to follow them. so yea, i did cause i have nothing else to do. haha. we went to wild wild wet. wth?! haha. first time there and it was superb. i just love water but scared of drowning. haha. so, i was the rose among the thorns. haha. my gfs was so busy working. and im left alone to go with these guys. btw thanks guys for inviting me. after that, we all proceeded to town. these guys just cant stop shopping. i was like the mother for them. choosing and deciding for them. haha. took taxi home cause some of them wanna catch the MAN U vs Chelsea match. so i just hop in cause im scared i'll reached home late. me and my curfews. till when can i not have my curfews mum?! but nvm, maybe mum just scared her daughter being kidnapped or what.haha.
thats all for this weekend. thanks to my friends for bringing me out and make my day. and i hope these will continue till i die. lol. to my gfs, pls, dun be soo busy with ur own things. cause its always me alone foollowing the guys. miss you people. Y

At last.

2009-08-08T12:37:00.002+08:00

at last, i get the wallet! i was lookin for it when yesterday, my eyes just caught it on the shelf at metro! thank god, i thought im not gonna get any chance of having it. well, i've been aiming this wallet for months. and the price just dont drop. so yest, i decided to just grab it cause i dun want it to be missing someday. dun ask me how much it is! haha. it comes together with the small key wallet. nice! :)

yest, i was on course again. i was damn sleepy! after finishing my work, i thought i could go home and rest, but mum called me and asked me come to sembwg! wth, i wanna sleep mum. but, being a good daughter, i decided to just meet her there. yea, nothing much there. mum decided to go to her fav. all time shopping centre, CWP! haha. took taxi there and continue walking. mum bought some stuff for herself. dad bought his phone, HTC! its gorgeous. ok dad, change my phone soon pls. haha!

and im jealous of my friend, nurul! i called her yest. and she was at NIGHT SAFARI! oh my, i wanted to go there for years man. i will go there one day. dun care if im gonna be lost or what. i just wanna see how it is. haha. been like 20 years here but never been to night safari. oh my, im not soo the explorer. :)

today is saturday! a superb day. but nothing much today. had no plans. all my Gfs are wroking today! shit..i hate being alone. now, all i can do is wait for my Guy friends to call me and ask me along to tag them..anyone reading this.call me and bring me somewhere ok? haa. now, i wanna cleaned my house and cook for my siblings. today recipe: NASI LEMAK! lol. btw before i forget, Happy Birthday to my Brother, NORDIKA! all the best in life bro.. ure the only one smoking in the house but nvm, as long as u know ur limits, im happy. Y

Karaoke-ing

2009-08-08T12:09:00.003+08:00

this was like on thurs. where i was drag and forced by my friend, Faridah, to join her and her school friends for karaoke-ing session. at first i dont wanna tag along but my friend just made me have the feeling of guilt. so, im being the soft hearted, joined in. haha! it was at cash studio at bedok. i was lost going there on my own. but somehow, manage to reach there just on time. making my way up, climbing the stairs, i feel as if im going into some cheap hotels. lol!
well, settled down and started to take turns and sing. it was my first time karaoke-ing. thanks friend for bringing me there. now, it makes me wanna go there often. haha! it was like 3 hours plus inside there singing. and i like the last part. where we dont even use the mics to sing. we just scream our lungs out. haha. and it was a nice choice of song, ISABELLA & ZOMBIE. haha! i loikeee. so, we packed our things and get ready to go out. i and faridah was so slow, till we have to solve something we dunnoe. the volume of the TV suddenly just went soo high. i barely cant hear my friend talking to me. we tried our best to lower it down but we cant. so, i just Pause it and ran out. haha!
so, it was like 10++ and im still in bedok?! im getting worried there. cause i got curfews man! lol. but my friend, faridah, decided to have supper at some coffee shop. this coffee shop, according to a bedok resident, said it was superb. yea, the food was truly superb. but i think they shuld order more soft drinks. cause the fridge was just empty! we only have hot drinks. wth! luckily, i remember my tea o ice. at least there's some ice in it. haha. so we talked and talked. and the clock just strike 11! and im getting more scared cause im still in bedok! goshh.. so i decided to take taxi with faridah. but faridah, last min saw the 168 bus and tried to talk abt the difference between taxi and bus. shut up girl. she made me run for the bus! and i know im going to reach home VERY late. so, i msg my dad, telling i'll be reaching home late. so, i close my eyes and sleep. but when i open my eyes, i was shocked cause the bus is still at ikea area there. oh god, i thought it was at the expressway or what. but nvm, i just sleep till it reached wlds. reached wlds at 12am! god! i cant believe it, i never usually went home this late ALONE! took bus home and mum opened the door. and she said nothing, luckily! sori mum and dad. i'll try my best not to do it again. haha. overall, had fun and tired. Y

The Hangover.

2009-08-06T01:01:00.004+08:00

well, no plans today. i went out early in the morning to do my practical. after practical, waited for an hour there for my FTP. there was 11 booklets but i manage to do only 4. and i pass 2 of it. haha! cool. cant wait for the next practical.haizz...
after my practical, went back to woodlands as i will be meeting faridah and izzat. all of us decided to catch a movie. so, i have to wait for both of them for like an hour plus.while waiting, shop with my lil sister. just a simple shopping. thats all. so, we catch hangover! and all i can say is, SUPERB! anyone wanna watch it, go ahead guys. its worth the 6 bucks. haha! its hilarious. it just make my day. haha.still imagining some of the scene in my head now... :)
after the movie, sat behind kfc as usual. and we talked. talked about our zodiac personality. haha. 2 snakes vs 1 dragon. but whatever it is, we both are totally diff. thanks friend for talking things out with me. but still, i need time to settle all this before i go any further. im not that strong to stand for myself. but i hope, i could. thanks again for the advices. will take all that into consideration.
tmrw im on course, so tired of courses. but at least i got a break from my ward routines. haha. and now, i wanna watch more movies. pls, someone drag me to the cinema and have a movie marathon. lol. cant wait for weekend. dun even know what's up for me this weekend. be waiting.. Y

Life.

2009-08-05T01:27:00.003+08:00

oh my, somebody pls just define me what life means. im living my life now, trying to live to the fullest but still, i cant achieve it. well,im enjoying my job now. however, some thoughts of taking a degree was crossing my mind. i even thought of becoming a doctor. lol. but, its gonna be a long way for me. well, its just a target. if im able to reach it, then kudos to me. :)
life as been up and down for me. sometimes im happy with life but sometimes i dont. however, everything happen for a good reason. and im waiting for the good reason to be out. well, im in confusion state right now. i dont even know what i want in life now.i dont even know where im heading to now. sometimes i feel abandon as there's no one to talk to and share stories. my two gfs are damn busy with their school and life. and my guy friends are all in camp, serving the nation. Shit! its a damn bad time for me to be alone right now. i hope weekends will be a great day for me soon. pls my friends, bring me somewhere i dunnoe! :)
truly, im feeling empty and lonely currently. i dont even know who to hang out with and have fun. gosh, this feeling is just killing me. but i have to keep strong to face the following days. and im trying my very best here. but pls help me guys, i need u people to involve me in any activities and keep me busy. so that i wont be thinking abt my poor life and start to shed my tears. oh my, that is uglyness. no worries though. im coping well today. just scared to face tmrw cause im off tmrw and my friends arent there to entertain me! aarrhh. but my dearest friends, i still do need u people around me. keep me going with u people surrounding me! thanks.Y

Saturday.

2009-08-01T21:50:00.006+08:00

Im on off duty today. yea, at last im free from werk. well, decided to do my car lessons at bddc. yea, i was at bbdc for almost half the day. do what i could and rush everything up. haha! currently, looking for a slots for my practical. had to do it fast! i just wanna drive! :)
saturday used to be a day out for me, however, not today. i dont even have any plans. friends are busy with each other own life. back to my loneliness and due to this, it made me think about things that shuldnt come across my mind. haha! well, here i am at home blogging. before i start deeper, happy nurses day to all the nurses out there!
yea, update pls. thats what people wanna read right. here are my updates currently.. im soo in love with my job. nursing aint that bad afterall. im enjoying it now. and hope this will last long. haha!
well, to that someone. i know you will be reading this. im speechless when u utter those words. when all u can say was " u are like treating me like a fool, like a toy! and im only ur last resort. no plans then u'll search for me.." waoh.. those words are really harsh to be utter out ok. if u think that im treating u like a fool or a toy, why in the first place u still dun wanna give me up and still falling for me. i dont force anyone to love me u see. and i just dun like when people say im treating that someone like a fool or even a toy! and pls, im not even thinking abt myself, im thinking abt ur position too. if all this while u think im just playing around, pls, u are most welcome to give up and move on. but pls, dun utter those words cause those words had been utter frm ur mouth for soo many times. and i kept quiet, but till that day, i cant bear hearing those words. it hurt my ears.
well, i had enough u see. it make me wonder. u guys would want to go an extra mile to get us in ur life. but when u get us, u guys just sit back and relax. and at the end of it, its u people who would hurt us. and dun blame us if anything happens. so, if u want to make ur extra miles worthwhile, plsss, treasure our presence. im being dissappointed for two times by both guys which i love soo much. yea, before falling in love, this two guys would just do anything to make me fall for them. and yea, i did fall and u people did catch me. it was wonderful for months and even years. but as months and years go by, things changed. i was the only one hoping and praying things would go smoothly. and u guys just suddenly left me alone coping my feelings and life without u. and truly it sucks and hurt me soo much. i even thought of killing my life and put to an end to everything. i dun wanna be a girl that would go into a relationship with any guys and break up few months after, then, date another guy and the cycle go back and again. i would rather know u people for months and be in relationship that would last till my last breathe.
i just dun know why suddenly i feel so damn tired with life now. feel like putting an end to it. i lost everything. i dun even know who to turn too and cry. i dun even know whose shoulders should i lean on...whose ears should i whisper to and talk my heart out. and to any guys out there, sorry if u think im treating u people like a TOY. maybe i am doing that without me realising. thank you for everything. and pls, i just need one guy to prove to me that all the guys are different! right now, no one has done it. and pls dont make me hate guys one day cause that will be badd. real bad. Y

Batam Trip

2009-07-28T01:31:00.004+08:00

at last, after much clarifications and changes, mum decided to went to batam last sunday! yea, i was on off duty, so, i managed to hang along with my mum and two sisters. well, objectives to go there was just to take a look at my mum house who she dun even know whose the one renting. yea, took batam fast ferry to sekupang. gosh, the man who chop my passport in sekupang thought that im married to a spore man! haha. well, i said, im still single and young. lol! so, reached batam with a warm welcome by my relatives there. luckily they are there to help us in our transportation. haha!

first visit was my mum old house. well, used to live there but now, it changed alot. it really improves. so, mum made some agreement with the rental person. mum thought of selling the house to her but still in discussion. after that, we proceeded to nagoya hill, which was a new mall there. so, it was huge and if i were to look for foods there, the place is just there. cool ness! after walking around the mall for hours, we decided to go to another mall by taxi. went to DC Mall.. thought its gonna be a happening mall but however, mum just gave us a false alarm. lol! so mum decided to end the walk and called our relatives to pick us up as it was already 7pm. mum decided to went to batam center terminal and bought our return tixs to spore. we took the last ferry which was 920pm.

while waiting for the last ferry, decided to walk around a mall which was just beside the terminal. the Batam Center Mall. it was way better than the DC Mall. so we walked around there. mum bought alot of stuffs over there. all was for this coming raya! the theme for this year will be BATIK. cool! so i and my sis donated some of our rupiahs money to my mum to buy the batik tablecloth that she wants. hmm..at last, i dont even bought anything for myself. but, its ok. enjoyed my day on sunday. reached home around 1 am sia. damn tired, now, im still having the tiredness in me. need more rest plsss. :) Y

At Last We Gather.

2009-07-26T01:30:00.004+08:00

Its been a long time since the last time we all gather. maybe months. well, everything changed as well as people too. couldnt believe that all this guys of mine are all serving their NS currently. some are schooling, working, serving the nation and some just rots at home. haha!
thanks guys for making the gathering a sucessful one. it thought its gonna be just like 5 people going but in the end, all of them turned up. except for one of my wonderful friend, Faridah. she has been damn busy with school and work. pls girl, dun stress urself up ya. meet us soon! well, today had a great day with them. plan was just to go marina square and watch the fireworks. we reached there and could only manage to watch for 5-10 mins of the fireworks. so, we sat there and talked, laughed and waited for another friends.
yeah, all i could say was, the day was just SUPERB! pls gather like this often ya. haha. im blessed with my life currently now. enjoying every moment of it now. and all thanks to my wonderful friends..i hope i wont feel lost anymore. Y

Feelings.

2009-07-24T01:49:00.002+08:00

time for an update in my life currently. well, this is something personal but just wanna share it. well, been knwing this guy for a month or so and yea, i've meet him. we have meet up a couple of times and truly, im enjoying every day out i had. he showed me what spore is and thanks for that. however, things happen. when i came to realise that im cheating my own feelings and his feelings.im soo sorry. truly, i admit that i still LOVE my ex, Shahril. and yea, i have not move on. i still somehow think of him and miss him. but i know, nothing gonna happen afterall. its just me feeling this way. but it takes two hand to clap. but im not hoping for anything shahril, i only pray for the best. :) and when u call me almost every single day, it makes me wonder why. but now i know, cause u do care about me although love doesnt exist. im fine with that. i dun expect anything though.

to that someone. im sorry to ask u to leave and even me leaving you. the reason is not because i want to wait for my ex. but, i just dun wanna hurt anyone in the future. maybe getting hurt now is better than getting hurt in the future. and i know how u feels. cause all this while, i know somehow u hope i'll be the one for you. but im not gonna be that ONE. and truly, i dun even know what the future holds for me. maybe i end up with my ex or even someone else. that is why, i think i better just live my life as it is. all alone. cause, i've been strong in leading my life. its not that i dun need man in my life.i do need them one day. but for this moment NO. i just wanna be a girl that leads her own simple life. soo, all the best to him. U may be damn angry or even wanna kill me during some point of time. but like i told you, i told u to stop and the rest is up to you. u may hate me or bad mouth me but i dont care. its part and parcel of LIFE.

yeah..now, im ALONE. living my own life. and i hope its the best for me. cause im damn stupid in decision making. :) i dun wanna think of love or even mariage. all i wanna think now is to be happy surrounded by beautiful people around and to travel around the world. i just want that in my life. once again, sorry to you. and to my ex, i have not move on yet, but i know u've move on. and its great to know that. no worries, soon, it will fade away slowly. Y

Roof Garden.

2009-07-19T01:01:00.005+08:00

yea. it was that day when i met my gf, Faridah. she had to do something abt her lappy things at Jurong. so, we decided to stay at IMM. met her there. we had a stroll over there. and truly, IMM changed alot since i last went there. they beautify it and did a great job on it. i truly adores it. well, i and faridah stroll every corner, every level of IMM. and gosh, Faridah even wants to went to the top level which are just offices and warehouses. haha. not enough of 3 levels exploring is it. lol.
when we came to the 3rd floor, gosh. i saw this garden there. and its like the roof garden which i saw in cck. however, this is much bigger and better than cck. no one was there at the point of time. i was soo excited and decided to play around there as faridah had just shot me with the zebra's help. haha. if i were 5 yrs old or so, i would be palying there for hours man. but, i just remembered that im not that young anymore. haha.
well, its a nice play to hangout man. would bring you guys there one day. well, thats all for that day. had a great day with my gf. thanks ya. Y

At Last We Met.

2009-07-14T00:41:00.005+08:00

it has been weeks since i abandon my friends or maybe the opposite way too. :)
well, today nurul called me up and wanted to meet up. so, yea, i met her up cause its been a long time since we sat and talked. suddenly, izzat and hafiz joined us. we had our dinner at banquet. and nurul, thanks alot for ur treat ya. haha! what goes around, comes around. :)
after our dinner, sat at the carpark as they need to filled their lungs with smoke. haha. while talking, we decided to play the Timezone! yea, how childish we are. so, everyone donated two bucks and played some basketball, dancing and striking! haha. we really had our fun and laughing session. ended it with sitting behind kfc as usual. and to hafiz and izzat, thanks for sending me home. so sweet of u guys. well, hope to go out again and have more fun aite. hope to gather the rest and have the fun that we used too.
i feel damn blessed to have my friends around me. happiness strikess me back.
overall, im tired as i only slept for one hour yest and now, i really need a rest.sorry for the short update. Y

Enough.

2009-07-08T23:48:00.001+08:00

been a long time since i've update my blog. been busy lately with my work and life currently. this is the only chance i have to update now. well, alot of things had happened in my life. sometimes i feel blessed with my life but sometimes i dont.
well, truly, ive dated some guys which i've known online. i enjoy it at first. but as time goes by, i feel something different. i dont thing these guys do take me seriously. pls man, i hate it when u guys just wanna have me as someone who just walked into ur life. i want to get to know u more and hope it'll be a peaceful one. but things happen the other way round. now, i feel so sick and tired with life and getting to know new guys.
truly, just started to know u for few months, and u guys had showed me ur negative attitude. and truly, i HATE it. i've had enough being hurt for 2 times. and i dun want the same thing to repeat in my life again. 2 times is enough! i hate to try!
i gave up now. i'll just wait for the right one to come across in my life. although it takes years, i dun mind waiting. cause at the end of it, i hope the guy that i dreamt for will arrive just in time. ok, enough of talking abt this guys.
im missing every little things that have come across in my life. missing my friends and i hope i'll have those spare time to meet up with you guys. so yea, tmrw im working morning so i have to dozed off now. till then, i'll TRY to update soon! Y

IKEA.

2009-06-23T02:58:00.006+08:00

yeah. today was my 2nd off day. mum woke me up around 1pm and decided to gave our kitchen a bath. yea, cleaned my kitchen and toilet. oh gosh, i cant stand it at all. after cleaning up, mum decided to bring me to IKEA. she's sick of Cwp, so now, changing her taste. well, i was kinda up to it but feel lonely at a point of time. so i decided to called up my younger sis, putri, and told her to follow me. yeah, i need someone to just entertain me. so, me, putri, mum and dad are the one that went to IKEA. well, it was nothing there. young people like me doesnt have to be there yet. haha. but, all i did was taking pics with Putri. yeah, we were excited to take pics after one another. we even get lost half way. lol.

had our dinner at IKEA there. i was full not because of food but drinks. i just keep refilling it cause its free. gosh, wish i could have brought my water bottles. haha! but nope, i didnt. we keep on walking and taking pics but mum just bought a few stuffs for home deco. after IKEA, we decided to drop by to the next store., GIANT! yeah..it looks big but when i walk through it, nothing much was there. mum just bought some groceries. and yea, with all the things and stuffs that we are carrying, mum decided to take a cab home. Great! i dun even wanna take a bus home carrying those bulky items. haha. well, i and putri was already exhausted by then. reached home around 11pm. tmrw im working but im not asleep yet..luckily im afternoon shirt tmrw. so i dun mind sleeping late.

some pics that i capture. what a day! i really enjoy my day out. thanks putri for accompanying me! lol. more pics are uploaded on my fb, check it out if u want too. now, its bed time! let me sleep and be in my lala land! Y

Welcome Baby.

2009-06-22T02:06:00.003+08:00

On saturday i was on morning shift. ended work and i thought i could go home and take a nap. but, my mum called me up and asked me to join her to visit my nephew. so, meet her at toa payoh. then we proceed. those are some of the pics that i capture. he is soo cute. well, i manage to grab her for a long time. surprisingly, he didnt even cry. good boy! well, his name is Dhanesh in short. couldnt remember his full name. sorry..haha! he's damn small and fragile. but i still loves carrying him around. he's just cute. hope that he will grow to be a great man!

after visiting him, i and my family went to stroll around toa payoh. didnt know that that area is full of hot stuffs. and i WILL go there to shop one day. hehe. after going round there, mum decided to went back to wlds. my mum still addicted to wlds..haha! didnt bought much stuffs. just window shopping. home sweet home around 11pm. had fun although im damn tired. but its ok, im on 2 days off. yeaaa! i'll have my precious sleep this few days.. :)

Im loving it.

2009-06-13T01:56:00.005+08:00

yea. today i went for my theory practice and evaluation. i manage to complete all the booklets during the practice. and im glad that i pass most of the booklets. well, when it came to evaluation. i went through the questions really carefully. i dun wanna even make a careless mistake. lol. so, i keep looking at it back and fro. when i ended that evaluation, im soo happy that i pass it. now, all i have to do is wait for my BTT. i hope i would not forget all the stuffs that i have just memorised. lol. all the best to me.

after bbdc, went to cck to meet up with my sweet friend, nurul. she has been attached there for a few days and when i ask her whether she has been to the roof garden, she said no! omg..u are soo not updated. lol. well, we decided to packet kfc and sit at the roof garden. we manage to watch TV on hher phone too. lol. had a great time with them.love it. im beginning to love cck because of the roof garden. :)

After cck, i decided to meet another friend of mine, Faridah. she was supposed to go for a bbq but end up, she's at the library, playing her lappy. so, i met her up and we sat there till the library was about to close. then, faridah cravings suddenly came. she decided to eat sushi. well, i had to eat those too. we grab it and had our tasting session. wth. haha. hoem sweet home around 11pm. now im damn tired.

Btw, shahril called me just now. im soo surprised to see ur name appeared on my phone. well, its really unexpected. i thought u have already forgotten me. lol. anyway, all the best in your life boy. now, i just wanna have a good nap cause tmrw im working! Y

Its Been A Long Time..

2009-06-12T02:33:00.004+08:00

yea..ended my two rounds of night shift. it was a long and tiring one for me. first night was fun but when it came to second night, my eyes are just killing me. they just dun wanna open fully. haha. well, glad that it ends. today is my sleeping day but i only manage to sleep for a few hours. woke up at 2pm and i have to rush to bbdc for my theory lessons. although i still feel sleepy, i had to force myself. i was at bbdc for two lessons. OMG! sitting there for almost 3 hours plus the aircon, just made me feel more sleepy. but i manage to survive and end the lessons with some learning points.

tmrw will be my theory evaluation. i hope i will did well in it. i just dun wanna repeat it. all the best to me. well, met up with my gfs after my lessons just now. thanks to faridah for accompanying me to have my breakfast + lunch + dinner. lol. we had Mcds as our choice. i wanted to eat the pasar malam food but faridah refuses. she just dun wanna sit outside cwp feeling hot. whatever. i had to just follow her choice cause all i want is just Food. at last, we settle down in Mcds. yeaa.thanks. after done with it, met up with my long lost friend, Nurul. oh my, she has been damn busy with her work nowadays. we sat around and watch TV on her new mobile phone. cool. haha.

now, at this wee hours. im still surviving. however, i can feel the tiredness of my eyes. they just wanna be closed for now. till then, will update soon. Y

Song of Mine

2009-06-03T02:20:00.005+08:00

Just an indonesian song to share here. love listening to it. a nice song for me. enjoy it guys. the lyrics had a lot of meaning here. =) and btw, please pause my background music first before pressing the play button. in case u forget because of excitement. lol. hope you understand it. anyone need some translation or understanding, i may help u in that. cause for me, its a big meaning. Y

Jurong.

2009-05-31T23:36:00.005+08:00

today did my theory practice. and i failed all the booklets! lol. but nvm, i'll study hard soon. at least i did good w/o even studying. if i study, i think, i'll passed.haha. but nvm, its just a Practice. practice make perfect u know. so i have to practice more. haha. ended at 2pm.decided to meet a friend of mine. yeah, headed to jurong point cause we cant be heading to the east as we are in the west.lol. headed down to jurong point..stroll around there. i saw this jacket which is soo fabulous. wanted to buy it but i need to save my money! nooo! i cant resist it. will buy it soon.haha. wanted to catch a movie at jurong point but the queue was just too long..xtremely long! so, we changed our mind and had a different plan. decided to watch it at cck.

catched this movie and all i could say is...its hilarious! i just enjoyed it..although i didnt watched the first series,i still think its a nice show. it worth my $9.50 tix. haha. yea..after the show, we grab some snack. that's my fav alll time -Prata sausage-! we headed up to the roof garden. the first pic there is the roof garden. i didnt know that cck has been that upgraded! haha. just love it sitting there..lookin at the kids playing with those water. the wind just keep blowing and we just keep on talking. had a great time. (= btw my friend, we'll try the ice cream that we saw at jurong point one day.. its cool man! haha.

back to cwp around 9. meet up with my family.. home sweet home after that. and btw tmrw im going to get that jacket that i saw! and i have to go to cwp tmrw around 11am just to redeem something at the info counter. well, loving every single days that im going thru now..Y

Days.

2009-05-30T19:43:00.003+08:00

As days goes by, im admit that im getting tired and exhausted. Now i know how hard it is to work and earn a living. im truly exhausted for the past months cause i just couldnt get a proper sleep and enough rest. my body is getting weaker and weaker. Now, im down with flu again but not swine flu ya. My head right now, feels like knocking it on the wall. I just dunnoe why and i hope it will get better soon.

Well, yesterday, had a call from my ex, Shahril. im surprised! Truly. i was with my mum having dinner when he called. i ask him why he called cause there must a reason when suddenly you just picked up ur phone and dialed my number. and the reason was that:" i just wanna know how have you been." ouh well, i've been great fyi. well, truly, i dun even feel excited or what when i receive his call. whatever it is, just suprised to hear ur voice after a couple of months keeping quiet. lol. so he send his regards to my mum. i told my mum and my mum was suprised too. my mum had been wanting to meet him and give him a tap on his shoulder. i dunnoe why. but, thank you mum for the support that you gave me. im touched that you still do bother about all this. although, i know. u are truly sad with all this happening to ur daughter. no worries mum! there must be a reason for all this. maybe there's someone better out there waiting for me! and i hope soo.. cause im truly scared to answer a love's call.. make sure when i fall, its worth the fall. (=

Been a long time i never update my blog. im blessed and happy with my life currently. great to be surrounded by my Friends all days long. great to get to know new people. i just miss all my friends now. where are you guys?! June, im starting my shift work and i think i would be damn busy with my life now. dunnoe when i can meet u guys and catch up with u all cause right now, IM MISSING YOU guys. Y

Enjoyment.

2009-05-28T01:53:00.006+08:00

Today i ended at 5. the talk on SWE was a fun one. i was not asleep. the speaker was a fun person and i just cant stop laughing. that was aan interactive class. well, ended at 5. plan to meet Faridah at cwp. so, i thought she was going to be the one waiting for me cause she ended around 330pm. however, she was still in school and donating her blood. so, i decided to head down to her school as i dun wanna wait for her all alone at cwp. met her at RP and took some pictures of a life saver. yea, she save life but not herself. i reached there and saw her leg being prop up. guess what, she went hypo after the donation. hw could she not went hypo..she just took a breakfast which was at 10am. siow girl! u may just faint there man.. luckily the doctor was concern and manage to get her back on her feets.

meet up with nurul at cwp. Izzat came after we went to take a stroll in cwp. we are just walking aimlessly. but sad, izzat was soo busy and concern about his bike getting fine. just chill man, anything happen, i hold the responsibility.haha.mcm paham! well, iizat decided to just sit by himself behind kfc and watch his bike. so met him back and ask to go for a dinner. faridah was weak already..that girl need to be fed! we went to catch a dinner at Macdonalds. first, nurul and izzat was not into eating. until i voice out and say "aku belanje la!".. wth..nurul quickly ordered for a Mcspicy meal! kate tak nak makan, tapi kalau aku belanje terus laju! lol. so, izzat was still trying to be nice..haha. i force him hard enough until he decided to eat nuggets. haiyoh, just to treat my friends are not that easy. some may be easy but some may just need to be force. haha. overall, had a great evening with all of them. they just make my day. thank you guys for meeting up..ILY!cant wait to meet the others who are damn busy with life..soon ya guys!

Thank you for being such a nice people surrounding me! i'm just blessed and filled with love by all of you. thank you again..Y

Confuse.

2009-05-25T21:23:00.002+08:00

Yes. something just i wanna share here. something from my heart and from my mind. so, anyone who reads it pls..dont msg me or call me after you guys have read this post.haha.
well, something just bothers me for this past fews days. i am not sure whether im in love or just a feelings for a moment. i am not sure whether i am really ready to fall in love again. but when i think back, i dont think i am. i think im not still in the clear state of mind to accept all these things. i am so sorry to anyone that reads this. i am now in my confuse state. i dont know whether what im doing now is right or wrong. im not even rushing or what. i just feel awkward with all this that im doing now. i just dunnoe why. i dun think i can.. cause it seem impossible. however, all i can say is, just let time decides. if there's something, well, it will happen. im leaving all this to God. right now, i think its best to be just BESTFRIEND. yea. Y

Family.

2009-05-23T23:50:00.002+08:00

Yea..get my first pay and im happy with it. although its only a 2 week pay. however, i manage to treat my family to eat. we had a difficult decision on where to eat but lastly, all decided to have dinner at pastamania. thank you acap for the VIP discount. haha. well, had a great day with my family. i bought my dad a shirt and some stuffs. for my mum,just gave her cash and i hope its enough for her. haha. had a great day out with all of them.

Tmrw im off. at last i get a day off. but tmrw, i'll bet i'll be busy. i had plans ahead and hope that i could go with it as planned. heard there's a Crocs sale at expo, so i think i wanna head there. to that someone who wanna accompany me, plss.. dun bubble me k! hahaha. and to my girlfriends, not the time yet to tell you guys who that someone is. its a secret. haha. soon u will know. haha.

well, had a great time today. im happy today. msging with him and hearing those words from him just make me smile. i dunnoe why but i feel different. haha. Thank you anyway. i will just wait till you really fall and hit the ground. haha. and to my lovely friends out there, im missing you guys badly!! really bad.. plsss, just meet up soon! yeaaaa..Y

Exhausted.

2009-05-22T19:54:00.004+08:00

well, truly one word to describe my daily life now --> EXHAUSTED. everyday waking up early in the morning is just not my type. i have to get use to this cause this is my LIFE now. well beginning to enjoy and looking forward to work now. although its tiring but my collegues and patients are the one who motivates me to come to work everyday. thank you!

Life as been great soo far. im beginning to accept the reality and move on. im moving on and im forgetting all the bad things that happen but the good times still remain fresh in my mind though. well, im happy and blessed with my life now. started my career and soon will achieve all the dreams that i've always had. i will achieve it with or without You. it doesnt make a difference. Im still ME.still bubbly and smiling! haha.

This few days, i admit that im DAMN happy! dun ask me why..i dun even have the answer. maybe because im getting my pay? or maybe im just..Happy for myself? haha. whatever it is. Im happy with life currently. a life on my own is just enough to make me happy. Thank you GOD for giving me the strength in leading my life. just one thing im sad, i cant learnt from my mistakes cause i dun even know what i made in my previous life. how can i improve myself when i dun even know where i go wrong? get the point? i hope you do. but its ok, i will just lead my life like normal, hoping not to repeat the mistakes i made.YEA! Y

Tired.

2009-05-16T18:30:00.002+08:00

Yeah.started my career last week. it has been exciting. However tiring for me cause for one month, i have to wake up early. the whole month will all start morning. that is tiring man. i cant stand it but i have to be strong. i just love my job currently. happy that at last i started my career. i hope i will be able to stay long in this. well, lately i have been sleeping late and not taking care of myself. now im down with fever and flu. but not swine flu, i hope soo. haha. well, although i fall sick, i do still wanna come to work. fun to be back in the same ward as i were last time. just need few more days for me to be more independent. i'm forgetting some of the skills already. haha. well, had my flu vacination that day and my arm is still killing me. omg.
well, heard the news of swine flu in malaysia just make me scared. as nurses, we have to deal with this. why should swine flu come! plss.i hope it stops somewhere. haha. well, missing my friends and life lately. it seem that i dun even have a life?? haha. but whatever it is. i dont care. now, i need to have a rest for a day and i hope i'll be fine back to work on monday. to my friends, IMY! pls..meet up soon ya. Y

Orientation cums Graduation.

2009-05-12T00:43:00.004+08:00

yea. the big day for me as arrives. the day i have been waiting for, my graduation. Firstly, thank you soo much to my beloved mum and Faridah for sparing their time to come down and see me graduate. I apppreciate it and Love you guys. well, nervous is what i can say when i was down there walking to receive my diploma. well, at some point of time, i feel that i just wanna cry. not sad but tears of joy. i have completed my 3 years study and thank you to my parents for supporting me. Now, my career have started too. i will do my best in everything.
To all my friends who have graduated too, all the best in your career. I'm missing my poly times man. nice to see you guys. Love ya.

well, i'm proud of myself to achieve this. To shahril, i know you wanna come down and see me graduate but too bad. its ok, i understand. just sad that you werent by my side. however, thank you to you too for supporting me during my poly times. it has been a long journey for me and there's more to come. i've started my career and i hope i will achieve what i want in my life now.
Thank you again to my MUM and FARIDAH. your presence has made me happy. REALLY happy. that's all for now. i'm tired with work already. now im down with fever and flu. no worries, will recover soon. LOves. Y

Tepak Sireh.

2009-05-10T12:20:00.004+08:00

yesterday had to work at tepak sireh.we had to attend a training on friday before the actual event. it was a BIG event. It was a mother's day dinner reception with karaoke session. there's a free photo session for all mum. first come first serve tables will be given a tiara and a secret recipe cake. awesome. the big event was Kris Dayanti! she will be having her dinner there after her concert at esplanande. that was what i was lookin g forward.haha.

reported to work at 5pm yest.setting up all the tables. guests started to come around 7pm. i was incharge of two tables. it was tough and tiring cause we have to take their order. served their drinks, starter, appertizer, main course and lastly the dessert. overall, it went on smoothly. keep doing my task till it was 11pm. and the person that all are waiting for arrives. Kris Dayanti. she was accompanied by her husband, Anang, and two lovely kids. too bad, i only had a glimpse of her pic. well, its not only kris dayanti having her dinner there, there were others too. they were rossa, sleeq, hafiz glamour, melly goeslow and more. OMG! it was an experience for all of us. here are some of the pic i manage to take.

event will end at 2am but we all are release at 1130pm. had to catch for the last train, however, there was no last train. so we took a bus to yishun and grab supper at Macd. went back to home by taxi. home sweet home at 2am.Y

Lots Of Love And Laughter

2009-05-08T00:30:00.003+08:00

wei..i'm missing those days sia. the day we had chalet. It was the BEST day in my life. when is the next one? haha. all are left memories but it will never fade. oh gosh..i just love the bunch of friends i have in my life! they are the one that will stick to me forever no matter what. i had a big group of friends and i just LOVE them. they make me laugh like shit and the crapiness among us, only God knows. lol.

To: My beloved friends.
Just wanna let you guys know that u guys are part of my life now. i will never regret knowing each one of you. every one of u has played an important part in my life, and i thanked you. although some of you may had hurt me in some time, i do forgive you and i still do love you. i may have lost someone i love truly but i have not lost you guys. i still have HIM as my friend. i feel blessed to have you all as my friends. Thank you God for creating a wonderful people around me. to some close friends whom i shared my problem with, i hope u know who u are. I wanna thank you for being there for me. Life as been tough for me but because of you guys, i made it till NOW. you guys are the Best Friends i have had. BFF!

Yea..that is truly frm the bottom of my heart. i realise that friends should come in 2nd in your life. the 1st is all up to you, maybe ur family or some may want it to be their lovers. its all depends. but guys, whatever happened, the one who will follow you till the end will be your friends. so do treasure them as long as they are still your friends. lol. i dunnoe why suddenly i'm soo emo. i just feel the love from my friends and i appreciate it. Thanks y'all. Y

Friends.

2009-05-05T04:21:00.003+08:00

Yesterday night had a meet up session with Nurul and Faridah. its been a long time since we hang out. I miss those days. meet up with nurul around 7pm. Idah came up later. had our dinner at KFC. we are just addicted to KFC i guess.lol. i had to meet Shahril cause i wanna pass him something. he also wanted to pass me something. so, met up with him around 9pm. sat behind KFC for quite sometime. Home sweet home at 11pm. Thank you Shahril u bought me a cap.na di realise its the same as urs just that the color is different.hehe. i really like it. appreciate it lots.so Izzat, u can get ur cap back! haha.

well, i pass him all the things that belong to him. all the memories. i just cant keep it cause i tend to look back at it and cry. its just too much. i gave him the anniversary cards that he gave me for the past years. gave him all the pictures that we took together. i had nothing left in my cupboard that associate with my relationship anymore. i dunnoe if u were able to put urself in my shoe. u can have it.just do anything to it.u may burn it or whatever cause it may be meaningless to u but not to me. i wanna keep it but i cant cause its just too much for me. Sorry.

Well guys, i have make up my mind. i'm not gonna fight for him. From today onwards, i am REALLY letting him go. yes i am. i know its gonna be hard. but with all my friends and family around mee, i think i'm capable of it. to my friends, esp. Faridah and Izzat. u guys have help me alot. Sorry faridah cause i gave up too fast and not fight for him. To Izzat, i will move on. thanks for ur advises. i'm blessed that i still do have my friends around me. However guys, dun think that Shahril is at fault. cause he's not. he got his own feelings. i cant force him to love me. he's doing what he think is right for himself. i love you.Y

Had enough.

2009-05-05T03:38:00.004+08:00

Well, things changed now. for the past few days, i still hope and pray that my love will come back to me. but hopes just hurt me. I appreciate the relationship that i we had been together Shahril. You made me open my eyes and make me understand the meaning of true love. i thought i'm gonna be ur one and only but its not. Like u said, love doesnt always end with happiness. u're right.

I've been with u for almost 4 years when suddenly u utter those words that i cant barely take it. i cant even stop crying. it hurt me alot for the past few days. however i still do not want to give up. i still think that i'm gonna fight for u and win ur heart cause i think u're worthy to me. but as days pass, the pain is just killing me. I gave up. yes, i did. im not gonna do anything. u want us to be friends, i will.

but i'm wondering. its soo unfair to be treated this way. i was soo deeply in love with you when suddenly u came up and tell me that u dont feel the love anymore. i think and think. where did i did wrong?i couldnt even find an answer for that. u didnt even tell me earlier that ur feeling are fading away.why? if u tell me earlier, maybe we can do something to save it. but maybe u just dun wanna save it. whatever. i just dont know what is running thru ur mind.someone tell me pls.

now, i gave up. im tired and i cant bare the pain anymore. you may just kill me anytime. so i just end it.that may be better for u. hope u find someone that will truly love you.

thank you for all the memories that we had together. i appreciate every moment that we spent together.

Weekends.

2009-05-03T17:44:00.003+08:00

Weekend kinda bored for me. use to looking forward for it but not now.yesterday get a call from tepak sireh. wanted me to work. grab etri and nurul along as they are shortage of staffs there. reached there 15mins late.gosh!get ready and waited for the briefing. well, the event on that day was just a lunch for the MPs. i and the manager was the one in charge of the VIP table as i was not new there. i was afraid to serve the them as i might just spill something or what. but everything went smoothly. Good. enjoy our day there. ended with delicious foods serve to us. yeah. next week will be Kris Dayanti eating there. cool. but i'm starting my career soon, so, i dont think i'll work there. i'll miss that place.
Today..woke up late as i slept late yesterday night. had no plans today. my phone didnt ring for the past few hours since i woke up. guess that all my friends are kinda busy. i'm all alone rotting at home. gosh..i just cant take it. feel that its been days since i breathe that fresh air outside. lol. wish that every weekend is great as usual but its not. pls GOD, help me to be strong in living my life each day cause now i'm weak. i am.

Karaoke.

2009-05-01T03:42:00.004+08:00

Woke up quite late today. straight away on my computer. oh man, i'm addicted to computer nowadays. played a game at fb. i'm loving it! Faridah ended her school around 4pm. i invited her over to my place. just to let her karaoke at my place. Thats what she has been craving from that time. sang all she could. i was busy in the kitchen cooking dinner for my family. people are just grabbing the hot dogs! So, faridah ended the karaoke session and join me in the kitchen. Sit and chat. After cooking, they had their dinner while i go for a shower. Mum wanted me to go over cwp and buy durians for her. so, headed to cwp with etri and faridah at 8.30pm. get the money from mum and bought the durians at cold storage. idah bought for her family too. she had one extra packet and decided to share among us and of course her love. waited behind KFC for her love. Once yat started to eat, they all grab it too. i was not in the mood of eating durians. home at 9.30pm. what a short trip to cwp..now i realise that i have not eaten for the whole day! omg..i still didnt feel hungry. i'll soon fall sick man. My body are aching.maybe due to yesterday fall!Today, shahril will be back from taiwan. good! at last he's back. been waiting for ur return. i'm missing him badly. but i got to be strong and i am now. and i will be for the coming days.Y

Jogging.

2009-05-01T03:18:00.007+08:00

A day for me to remember. mum was off on weds. she wanted me to accompany her for shopping. so i had too cause nobody else was at home. spent half of the day with mum. Etri sms me around 7pm, invited me for a jog. i was up to it! reached home around 8.30, i quickly get changed and was ready for a jog. Meet nurul and her small bro, Ajid, at the bus stop. And nurul, stop acting to be fierce before i get mad.lol. Faridah did not join for the jog as she was asthmatic. she will join after the jog. so, i and nurul all started to jog. Ajid always want to be the first. so, we just jog slowly. reaching to faridah blk..i had a feeling of sprinting and be the first person rather than Ajid. so i sprint! when i came to this corner..OMG! i just lost my balance and i fell. it was soo bad. thanks to nurul and etri for helping me. Helping to laugh their ass off! i was badly injured sia.
but i know it was funny. so, headed to faridah blk..i thought she was at home. but the truth came. we were under her blk when she just wants to take the lif up! LIAR! all the way she was at cwp meeting her love. so i ask her to bring some first aid for me. she wore a glove on her right hand, holding a two cotton balls applied with minyak gamat. she thought my bruises was a small one but its not. however, thanks medic!
we had fun playing the badminton. i almost forget that i fell. lol. Thanks to Ajid for being the referee. He had his own rules and regulation. whoever plays cheat start from zero again. lol. He made us laugh. Children just make our day u see. Stop for awhile as i need to pay mum's bill. Faridah accompanied me while Etri was playing badminton with her BF. When i came back, i knew who was losing. the one sweating like pig. ACAP! loser. haha. Overall, had fun. Y

Congrats!

2009-04-27T01:02:00.002+08:00

Well today.i had no plans of going out. however,received a call from shamil. he invited me to go to his grandma house. its been a long time i have never seen nenek and his mum. well, the objective was to visit kak nisa who just give birth today. Congrats to kak nisa and abg shamsul in their 2nd child. its a girl! i wish i could hold the baby but we can only see it through the glass. the baby was in the special care unit. she was diagnose with somekind of infection. now being treated with antibiotic currently. hope, she will get well soon. i can see that kak nisa is in pain. the baby girl was not a normal delivery. she had to go for an operation. pity kak nisa. hope she's fine. she will be discharged tmrw but the baby will remain there for treatment. no worries, she will be fine. the baby was given a name that is soo long and complicated. sorry if the spelling is wrong, but it sounds something like this. PUTRI ERIN ERIANI. what a nice name. CONGRATULATIONS TO THEM!

Wedding

2009-04-27T00:20:00.006+08:00

Yesterday my family attended a wedding at ang mo kio. Had the chance to meet my relatives. all the aunties and the uncles and the babies! leave house at 8pm. family thought of attending it on sunday but mum cant make it cause she's working. end up, we attended it on saturday night. all were set nicely. there's variety of food there and people just keep on coming. it was wonderful to meet all my relatives there. i was not looking forward to the food there but looking forward to see my nephews! omg! all of them are super cute.

look at them! these three little girls are killing me! i just grab them while i can. donia, the shy girl will always be on my lap. dwi, the active one will keep wanting to run away. putri, the hot stuff there. i cant even get to carry her. people are just grabbing her! lol. these three girls make my day. i love them! they are growing fast and that means that i'm getting older.lol. cant wait to see them grow.

Missing you.

2009-04-24T01:46:00.004+08:00

Firstly, sorry to him cause i didnt send you to the airport. sad to see you go. he's been in taiwan for weeks. and i'm fcuking missing you la sey. well, dont know abt you there. truly sad cause i didnt get any update or news from him.i msg him once but no call or msges were received. all i wanna know is how are you over there. why cant you just give me a call?im wondering abt that. but i'll wait no matter what. well, things had not been good this month for me and him. i know i just have to be strong to face this alone. you are no more by my side every moments. but,i'll be there always for you baby. thanks to my friends for being there for me. love you.

i admit iit was my fault that cause this to happen. i realise and will learn from it. thanks baby. sometimes i just thought of giving up to get u back cause you really seem laid back. but now, i realise, u worth alot to me. i cant throw u. i will fight back to win your heart.heard me babe! i will do anything to fight and win you back cause i really cant live w/o you. i'm missing every single thing that we've went thru together. i just hope one day, u will return to me. well, if u came back, u will be mine forever but if u dont, i will let you go cause we really dont mend for each other.

whatever it is...at the end of everything. i'm sorry and i love you. Y

Call it a Day.

2009-04-24T00:18:00.006+08:00

Sleep at 6am yest.busy helping etri with her blog.well, credits to me.what a nice blog! so, i woke up at 12.had to clean the house as usual.lazyness strike me but i have to force myself. thanks etri for helping me in the kitchen.there's a reason for that. she wants me to go to novena and change something for it.luckily faridah manage to accompany me. thanks babe.so, headed dwn to novena.do what we have to do. suddenly our craving for donuts came, headed to donut factory and taste all the temptation donuts. is it our mouth or the donuts are just fcuking delicious??

headed back to wlds around 7pm.faridah had her craving of kfc's chicken! but it didnt come true.lol.adik dun be sad ok.? hehe. in the middle of our dinner, met up with izzat. he came to take his ezlink,thanks friend for the ezlink. took some exorcism pics.lol! well, good luck to izzat in getting the cardigan girl.cant wait to see you having a girlfriend! lol. well, thanks friend cause i really dont have a life and i'm totally addicted to facebook! admit that!

they went home at 9.15pm cause we had a show to catch! however, i didnt manage to catch it cause mama called me to accompany her to the Metro sales! gosh, people are grabbing everything like no business! i wish i had money to buy those stuffs. all was on 20% off discount, but only open to metro members. well, mum spent a total of $116.shes a shopaholic!i will be one soon.home sweet home at 1130pm.need some sleep.

Happy birthday.

2009-04-21T23:28:00.004+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUHAMMAD RASIDI BIN HASSAN!

Well..he just turn 21 today. Glad to be know him. He's a guy that just keep you smile and i value this friendship.I msg him when the clock strikes 12! but too bad, i was the 3rd person to wish him.Nvm. All the best to him! semoga di murahkan rezeki dan di panjang kan umur! Amin.

Today, mum get her pay.i have to clean the whole house by myself cause both my sis went missing early in the morning.So, i and mum went to cwp for a stroll. Nothing much there. A guy in kfc just smile and wave at me and i was like 'who are you'. Whatever. Reached home around 8pm. all i do was checked my facebook and blog. One last thing: i miss u baby. Pls call me or what! i'll be here waiting.

Same shit.

2009-04-21T01:17:00.003+08:00

I had only like 5-6 hours sleep just now. It seem that i'm getting lesser sleep but i eat more, this is a problem for me. Will find something to do about it. just need motivation. anyone wanna jog or so, just beep me aite. I'll be ready with my sports shoe.Lol.
Well, today met up with Faridah. i know she wanna meet me but she's denying it. Sorry babe cause you didnt get to karaoke at my house. The lion is at home! haha. He will eat your flesh! but luckily today,my lion is a vegetarian. Wanna know who is the lion. Ask the one who starts with it! Lol. I cleaned my house and cook while faridah did her reflection journal. leave house around 7pm, walked around cwp like we always do. head down to kfc as etri and nurul are working. we had a deal faridah! sat down in kfc for hours. at the wee hours, started our camwhoreness! the lighting is just nice! i loiike. We look hot! more pics are in idah's lappy. she promise to send more to me tmrw! be waiting!
Oh my, i'm starting to miss HIM! what took you soo long to give me a call and update about yourself??! plss..dont do this to me. everyday i'm waiting for your name to appear in my phone! i'll be glad to hear from you soon baby.

I'm back.

2009-04-20T05:07:00.002+08:00

YEAH!
hey everyone..i'm back to blogging again.well, just a space for myself.Things have changed in my life but i will keep on going cause i will fight for what i lost and gain it. Just finish editing my blog which is simple but romantic.lol. will keep updating!